I have been with my boyfriend for over 1.5 years, and throughout this time he has been jealous, controlling and basically has made me absolutely miserable at times. To add to this we have been in a long distance relationship for the last 6 months, which has made this even harder as his jealous tendencies have become noticeably worse, he even sends me very ugly texts when I am out for a coffee with friend or so, and he requires I talk on Skype everyday for hours.. which is the result of arguments almost everyday. We live in our different home countries and as we are fresh graduates we are quite focused on our careers, and neither of us wants to move to the other person's country in the near future. There are other problems too... We see each other every 3 weeks for a weekend, however he earns much more money than me but is unwilling to help pay for flights to see him, so its becoming quite a burden on me financially. Also he never used to make an effort to think of something fun to do for both of us, and he never went out of his way for me which annoys and saddens me and can even be embarrassing when he doesn't give me anything for Xmas or my Birthday (he is Scandinavian and claims that its not tradition to give presents), but I can see lately that he has been trying and willing to change at least in the last few aspects.
Despite all this we have had good times, we have many things in common .. he can be a very nice guy, I trust him 100% and I know he loves me dearly. It is also great between us when we are together as we see eachother so little and try and make the best out of it. However 90% of our relationship is now long-distance, and it has become as I have described above.
However due to his negative behaviour I have stopped loving him, I just like him and I am becoming really nasty and angry when I have to sit down and chat on Skype after a long and tiring day at work.. We argue to the point of where I cry hysterically and I can physically feel that I am stressed out. I have become scared of even going out to the cinema with the girls as he gets suspicious and jealous, or when he calls on my phone I am already thinking.. ';what wrong did I do this time?'; as he usually suspiciously questions me for being 20 minutes late from work or so, and I'm scared of even picking up. I am not some wild child, just a normal girl and I would never cheat on him and I don't do anything to provoke him. I have told him many times that he is controlling and jealous and we have had countless arguments on the topic, and he claims that he is aware and is changing, yet I can't see anything.
The bottom line is that my life has become quite miserable with him, my social life has gone down the drain, yet I am so scared of being single/being with someone who cheats on me/doesn't love me. I keep seeing people cheating on their ';loved ones'; all around me and it really shocks me at how common this is. I know my boyfriend loves me to bits and would never do such a thing(I'm sure thats what they all say, but I honestly trust him), and I know this is quite rare. I am 25 and have not had much luck in love before, always falling for the bastards... My mother always says that the common life goals and common interests can be more important than passionate love, but I can't help wondering that at 25 there must be more to life than just giving up and staying someone who you ';like';.
Please help me with this, what is your opinion?Should I break up with him?
HELL YEA BREAK UP WITH HIM!!!!!!!!Should I break up with him?
Only you can choose that. If you let one of us choose, then you are leading your life. My opinion, however, is no.
Dump him. You're welcome
Come on, do you really need our advice? Everything in this question is talking about how unhappy you are with him.
What is holding you back? The 1.5 years? Forget it it's totally not worth it, especially since you are in different countries. There's nothing to look forward to and all signs are leading to a break up.
Don't hold onto a few good memories if they are not outweighing all the bad parts of your relationship.
The answer is pretty simple and you know it. Break up with him. be a big girl and do it. Dont drag it on and hurt each other any longer. And save your money, look out for yourself, cause this guy is not doing it for you, he sounds like a jerk.
You should let it go simply because your doing long distance relationships thats never a pretty sign and plus you said you just like him not love.arugments and nasty text is for teens your 25 live a little take chances be free
Short answer: yes, you should break up.
Longer answer: While your time together now might be nice, things like you have described (anger, jealousy, selfishness) only get worse. They don't get better. Stop being scared of being single. It's better to be single and unhappy than married and miserable, don't you think? The only thing you should be scared of is wasting your precious time on someone you barely like and who obviously has some serious issues to confront while you're potentially missing out on someone who could be much better for you. Dump the dude, restart your social life, and be happy.
Face it, hon: with him refusing to let you go have a life that isn't centered around your computer, you're alone now. At least if you left him, you'd be free to see your friends - and you might get to meet someone in the same area who's secure and trusting enough not to mind if you occasionally want to do things that don't involve him, and who won't take advantage of that freedom to cheat. (Though before you do that, you might want to get some professional insight into why you keep making these bad picks of yours, since I'm afraid Mr. Controlling fits that pattern, too.)
If your truley that miserable and can't stand it, the best thing to do is probably break up.. If he doesn't buy u anything for ur bday or Christmas and doesn't even want to pay for u to come and see him when he knows u cant afford it then it's just not worth it. Eeryone needs someone who is willing to do whatever it takes to see the one they love.. Jealousy and controlling is not fun. There are plenty more out there that will love u as much or even more than he does and treat u better but it's not my decision..
Good luck
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