How to break it off gently without it getting ugly???

How do you break up w/someone you love and have feelings for but they are just not the right one for you and you know it is gonna kill them when you do it?? B/f of 9 mos.,we live together,in 9mos there have been way too many arguements for me to keep going on like this..I think he may be bi-polar and has some issues within himself,but is a great guy and when things are good--their Great but when we argue its UGLY..and we both have bad tempers so its like we dont mix on that level..it usually ends with one of us leaving till the other calms down..but everytime he acts like a real jerk..which is often..everyday situations sometimes seem to set him off..actually i dont know what is gonna set him off.I guess i'm not used to this up n down relationship and i REALLY mean it when i tell him its over..but he wont go away..he calls,texts,shows up,pleads and begs sometimes and i usually give in and YUP here we go again--ROUND AND ROUND it seems like---HELP?????How to break it off gently without it getting ugly???
The best way to keep it from getting ugly is not to fall into the game if it gets ugly. Are you leaving or do you want him to leave?? Probably best if you leave by the sounds of your temper.





Just make a pledge not to get into the screaming match, and if he is angry and bi-polar you'll never be able to explain it to him, there aren't enough words, and you'll never get him to get it, there aren't enough words. They always want more information.





So just say your peace and leave. And you don't have to say anything about him maybe being bi polar just say all this arguing is not good for me. If he promises to change if you don't leave just tell him to call you when he does change.





Just gotta do it.........stop playing the game. And good for you for seeing the pattern.





Good luck





xxxlbHow to break it off gently without it getting ugly???
It's a cycle, and the cycle won't end. You can end it without being mean or vindictive yourself, but you can't control how he will react. You can't respond to his begging, his calls, his texts, and if he shows up, you need to ignore him. If he is displaying abusive behaviour, it is in your best interests to sever all ties with him as soon as you can. There are usually services available within a community for women trying to escape an abusive relationship but finding it difficult. I suggest looking those services up in the yellowpages or online and making use of them.
You gently tell him at the right time that the past 9 monthes have been great(just saying that is gentle not anything about arguing it may hurt his feelings a whole bunch) but I don't feel like it's working out, I like you a lot but I don't feel any sparks between us anymore....so I want to Break It Up..... Us......Up, thats what you tell him but i suggest that you stick with him, nomatter how tough it has been he may need you for some support and maybe he does still like you alot too but he may feel comfortable about his emotions with you so much that he expresses them to you even if they are yelling,arguing, anything like that, etc. If you decide to keep him than if things don't work out still after you had the talk, then still two choices remain. One: Break it Up. Or Two: Conseouling maybe he needs some professional help, so remember everyone deserves a second chance. And remember no ne is perfect. (my dads the same way he takes pills for them or atleast he used to don't remember which ones or what they are called.)
did you ever hear the saying ';things end badly or they wouldn't end'; ???
sounds like you may be bi-polar or something yourself





maybe thats why you like him